


Fool's Gold

by gooseygoose



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Angst, M/M, Prince Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun, Unrequited Love, jaehyun waxes poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-26
Updated: 2020-12-26
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:47:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28339452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gooseygoose/pseuds/gooseygoose
Summary: Falling in love with Renjun was both the best and worst thing he's ever done.Jaehyun wonders if he knows just how much power he held over him.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun
Comments: 10
Kudos: 59





	Fool's Gold

**Author's Note:**

> Something I wrote really quickly, hope you enjoyed!

Jaehyun wakes up every morning to a sunny smile, and his clothes laid carefully on his dresser. It's as invigorating as it is painful.

"Good morning my liege." Renjun bows deeply. “What a beautiful day!”

"It's a fine morning."

"Rare these days, my lord. Hopefully, with the coming spring, we shall see warmer weather." His hands carefully slide open the curtains, and let the streaming light enter the rooms. Jaehyun’s heart pangs at the sight of those dainty fingers gripping the linens. He wishes he could hold them in his own hand.

He pulls himself back. "A fine day like this should not go to waste. Please let the stables know I'll be going on a ride today."

"Hmm, only after breakfast, my liege. The chefs made your favorite. Or mine. They might give you three sausages, but you might only get to eat two." Renjun lightly jests, another twinkle in his eyes.

"Anything for you."

Jaehyun wishes that this moment could be immortalized forever. Renjun in the mornings, standing under streaming sunshine is such a gorgeous sight. His heart beats half to death just by this sight alone - has been for every morning, and always will for this man.

Renjun like this could ask him for the world, and he would give it. He'd give everything he had.

"Maybe I'll steal a buttered roll as well, if you don't mind." Renjun laughs. "I'll be right back to fetch you for breakfast, my lord." And with another mischievous glance back, his manservant exits his rooms, a hop in his steps and a tune hummed under his breath.

Jaehyun can finally breathe easy after he leaves. Even without Renjun around, no other thoughts enter his brain, when it is overflowing with the very person that was just there. It's futile to just stop, and all so easy to sink into all those thoughts and just think and think about Renjun. His eyes, his nose, that little laugh - oh, how all of that sends shivers up his spine. A craving that can never be fulfilled, an emptiness that will never be full, too much that will never be enough.

It's the best of feelings, and the worst of them.

*******************

"Sit up straight, Jaehyun."

"I am, mother."

"Straighter. Your back ought to be a rod, not bent like a willow." The Queen's expression doesn’t change, despite the admonishments she lashes out. Too tranquil for the vitriol out of her lips. "How can you possibly fit into the nobility with the manners of a pig? We cannot afford more shame onto our name."

"Our name is good, mother." Jaehyun answers, but softly. "We have nothing to be ashamed of."

"Do not speak back to your mother. And have you forgotten the famines and the mutiny that ravaged our kingdom? Have your teachers taught you nothing on our name? We must fire them at once - your lack of humility and garbage manners will make the Jungs look like nothing more than common peasants."

Jaehyun says nothing, and the bitter silence stretches on. When their breakfast concludes, and the bowls are whisked away and replaced with empty porcelain tea cups, the Queen sternly reminds him. "Your fiance's family is fickle - we must not be anything less than perfect. Our country cannot allow it."

The crowned prince bows at those words. The Queen is a harsh woman. It's only fitting that she is, considering her position with her ill husband and poor lands. She knows to stand tall, and graceful, and how to pretend to have everything when she has none.

Prince Jaehyun should know better. He was born to be married off. His dashing looks, and charisma were a bonus to a game of politics that had gone on long before he ever existed. He's just another piece - maybe a sacrificial lamb, maybe he'll get to check the queen - but he is definitely not the player. Marriage has never been about love, romance, other childish follies; this was never hidden from him.

The Grand Duke of the Lee Kingdom has everything - from the land to the ports, to the money and the stupid and old blood line - the only thing left was a better title.

Fickle, yes. The ball was in their court.

Duke Doyoung was a scholar at most, in love with the words Jaehyun weaves, and the knowledge he parades. But he's certain that Doyoung would scoff at the plain wants of his heart, like beautiful smiles and delicate hands.

But penniless, he is not.

*******************

Renjun smoothes out the lapels of his jacket with a small smile. Jaehyun can't help but wonder if he can feel the strength of his heartbeat. Will he question it? Why the prince's heart beats so strongly at the lightest touch of his manservant?

"You look magnificent tonight, my lord. Our guests shall surely be pleased with such a sight."

In the dusk light, the rose beams of the sun, Renjun looks just as breathtaking as he does in the morning. Jaehyun may be dressed up, but no amount of silk tunics, and velvet jackets could compare.

"Am I pleasing to your eye?" He dares to ask.

"Of course! My lord, you're one of the most handsome men I have ever seen!"

Somehow a compliment from Renjun was all he needed. The other mistakes his relief for smugness instead, and shakes his head.

"Am I just feeding into your ego? Gosh, I hate it when you get me to do that.” Renjun teases, brushing invisible dust off his shoulders. “Well, I'll let it go just for today, but it won't happen again!"

He takes a last look at Jaehyun, standing in all his finery. And then takes a small, fortifying breath before placing a hand on his shoulder. "I know that this is out of line for a servant, but I also know that you're nervous about the engagement. But you're gonna do great with Doyoung. You're Jung Jaehyun, and he's gonna love you!"

Renjun beams at him. Jaehyun's heart sinks. The pureness of his intentions is not lost on him, and Jaehyun doesn't dare let the follies of his heart meddle with his perception of those words.

"... Yes. I have been worried about him. And the relations between our countries."

"And I'm glad to be the one to assure you. I know that I'm just a servant, but Jaehyun, I will always be happy to lend an ear. " Renjun's big eyes imploringly look into his. "Besides, you can't lie to me! I could feel your heart racing, and talking is the best medicine for these types of nerves. I care about you too, y'know?"

Jaehyun doesn't try to correct him, and his wrong conclusions. It's better this way, he tells himself. He walks through to the ballroom to find his fiance, and gently kisses the back of his hand like the true gentleman he's always trained to be.

All the while, all he can think about are the delicate hands of the twinkly eyed servant pressed against his chest, so close to his heart.

***********

Falling in love with Renjun was both the best and worst thing he's ever done.

The life of a prince was never easy - the luxuries of gold, and jewels and power are a pittance compared to yearning for a love that he'll never be able to receive. A love that he'll never be able to give. This should have been obvious to him before Renjun became involved.

It was so easy to fall in love. So so easy. Why did it have to be Renjun? Jaehyun knew his place, he knew when it meant to be the crowned prince. He knew his life was written out for him, and he has had his entire life to accept that.

But Renjun with his small smiles, and little hands effortlessly drew him in and drowned all his grievances.

Jaehyun wonders if Renjun knows just how much power he held over him. How much joy every word, every look brings him. How his sunny smiles and cute jokes are all that ever runs through his head, and that his heart beats to Renjun, and how every heartbeat feels like torture. How much he would worship him, if he just could.

But he can't, and his secrets are held tightly to his chest. They consume him alive, and yet, every day he is rebuilt all the same.

A prince should never be allowed to hope. Falling in love wasn’t elegant, nor was it graceful. When the simple wants of his heart were too much for him to ignore, there was only the truth left to be told.

************

If anything, Jaehyun knows he's deeply selfish. Love is selfish, and a secret one is the most selfish of them all. He keeps his feelings tight against his heart, but even the most complex of knots can’t keep them all in.

"Come with me."

"To the Lee Kingdom?"

"Yes - I understand that this is a large request to ask, but I would be more... comfortable with my own manservant with me at their estate."

It would be utterly unbearable to go such a long time without seeing Renjun. Without the beating of his heart to the metronome set by those delicate fingers bathed in sunshine. 

Renjun nods with enthusiasm, eagerly grinning. "Of course! Anything for you, my prince! It would be an honor to continue serving you." He drops his head, cheeks blushed with pink. "It has been an honor too - Prince Jaehyun, I will continue to loyally follow you as long as you would want me to."

Jaehyun fears that the most. How would he react if the Crowned Prince of the Jung Dynasty proclaimed his love towards him? Will his feelings be returned in kind? Would that fall under loyally following him?

"Thank you Renjun. I will be honest-" He cannot be. He will never be. "I appreciate you coming with me the most."

**********

The air in the Lee Kingdom is fresh, with the heavy scent of salt and the sea. The Lees welcome him; the Grand Duke appreciates his quiet commentary on the architecture, the Duchess is enticed by his charm, and Doyoung enjoys their friendly banter.

Naturally, it's Renjun's opinion that matters the most.

"What do you think of this place?" He asks one day, startling both Renjun and himself.

"I like it here. It's really nice. You seem to be getting along well with the family." He fiddles with the handle of the broom. "I like some of the people I've met here too. They're all very kind."

"Oh? You've made friends with the others?"

"Something like that." He brushes off. There's a tint on his cheeks that Jaehyun realizes with a sinking heart that he wasn't the cause of.

"Someone more?" He wills his voice to remain steady.

Renjun flushes a pretty red, and shyly answers. "One of the ones at the stables - we've been getting along really well. I- well- he's been very kind to me."

Jaehyun forces the most natural smile on his face. "You should introduce me. To your friend."

"Ah, no. I don't want you to scare him away. He's- I really like him, but he’s shy."

He wonders if his heart could bear anymore than the pain of watching Renjun blush and fluster over another. Whether the weight of a crown can fill the space left behind from his heart.

"I'm happy for you."

Renjun smiles. "Thank you my lord - Jaehyun. If it weren't for you, really, I would've never been able to come here. You've treated me so well all these years. I'm truly grateful I served you of all people."

He locks his heart up one last time, and swallows the words that could break it all loose. His silence doesn't speak volumes, nor does Renjun understand his heart's tales when they remain unspoken words. He had chosen this, he tells himself, it was only right.

"Thank you Renjun, for being by my side."


End file.
